User:0xea
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A year of my work as a contributor and moderator have been anonymized for calling out the abuse of power and transphobia coming from 3 moderators.
Xea
Hyia!, Im Xea, auti transgirl, born early 2000s in Berlin.
Feel free to chat me up <3, just don't be a meanie.
Special Interests
- chemistry and pharmacology
- low level programming and reverse engineering
Mental Issues
- (hypo-)manic episodes
- autism
- severe sensory issues
- attention deficit disorder
- long term dissociation
- self-harm tendencies
Complications
- Anaphylaxis - Intravenous Contaminant
- Serotonin syndrome - Intravenous Orthophedrone and MDMA
- Stimulant psychosis - Intravenous Orthophedrone / Oral Amphetamine and Dextroamphetamine / Intravenous and Insufflated N-Ethyl-Nor-Pentedrone / Intravenous and Insufflated 4-Methylpentedrone
- Transient ischemic attack - Oral Caffeine / Intravenous Amphetamine / Intravenous Methylphenidate
Why am I not dead yet?
Do I want to die?, Do I want to life?
Experiences
- Experience:70mg Lisdexamfetamine (oral) - My first stimulant experience
- Experience:1800mg Caffeine - Bipolar disorder and a bottle of pills
- Experience:35mg Dextromethamphetamine + 305mg 3-Methylmethcathinone + 20mg 2C-B - destroying myself before rebuilding
- Experience:2955mg 2-Methylmethcathinone + 276mg Diacetylmorphine - Stimulant psychosis ego death nightmare
Substance Matrix
Route of Administration Ranklist
- Intravenous
- Cephalic
- Median cubital
- Femoral
- Dorsal metacarpal
- Small saphenous
- Dorsal venous arch
- Great saphenous
- Inhaled
- Metered-dose Inhaler
- Volatile Fumes
- Intrarectal
- Injection
- Suppository
- Subcutanous
- Intramuscular
- Deltoid
- Vastus lateralis
- Vastus intermedius
- Transdermal
- Patch
- Gel
- Oral
- Capsule
- Solution
- Tablet
- Powder
- Vaporized
- Vaporizer
- Oil pipe
- Foily
- Combusted
- Intranasal
- Powder
- Spray
Substance Ranklist
adoration ❤ hatred
Hormone Medication
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Estradiol Undecylate ❤ | prodrug ester of life saving hormone; produces stable levels with no crashes when injected monthly | |
Estradiol Enantate | prodrug ester of life saving hormone; minor crashes when injected weekly; discomfort when injected every 4 days | |
Estradiol Cypionate | prodrug ester of life saving hormone; crashes when injected weekly | |
Estradiol Valerate | prodrug ester of life saving hormone; crashes when injected weekly | |
Estradiol ❤ | life saving hormone; caused figure changes, breast growth, body hair reduction, skin smoothing and minor emotional enhancements | |
Dutasteride ❤ | significantly reduced hairloss; no side effects; very long halflife | |
Cyproterone acetate | helpful when estradiol levels drop below monotherapy levels; no side effects noticed so far | |
Beclometasone dipropionate | might slightly have helped respiratory issues | |
Melatonin | barely effective sleeping aid; potencially improves quality of sleep | |
Finasteride | coincided significant suicidal thoughts; very short halflife; stopped treatment after a month |
Entactogens
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Methylenedioxymethamphetamine ❤ | my favorite psychoactive substance; helped fix several friendships; allowed me to reprocess some traumatic events; will turn anybody into a cuddle-machine; do not intravenously inject, will drain serotonin immediately, gave me serotonin syndrome | |
Cocaine | quite stimulating; quite euphoric; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very short duration; surprisingly entactogenic | |
3,4-Methylenedioxy-alpha-Pyrrolidinoisohexanophenone | quite stimulating; quite euphoric; quite entactogenic; heavy cardiovascular side effects; moderate duration insufflated | |
Metaphedrone | lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; clean but short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive(made me feel as if this feeling would be the purpose of the rest of my life); high dosing requirements; memory disruption; corrosive | |
Orthophedrone | lighly entactogenic; increadibly stimulating; extreamly short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive; high dosing requirements, although more potent than expected; memory disruption | |
Mephedrone | cat-piss odor; lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; medium dosing requirements |
Stimulants
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Lisdexamphetamine ❤ | favorite psychoactive substance for productivity; prodrug of my favorite stimulant | |
Dextroamphetamine | quite stimulating; clean euphoria; minimal side effects | |
3,4-Methylenedioxy-alpha-Pyrrolidinoisohexanophenone | quite stimulating; quite euphoric; quite entactogenic; heavy cardiovascular side effects; moderate duration insufflated | |
Orthophedrone | lighly entactogenic; increadibly stimulating; extreamly short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive; high dosing requirements, although more potent than expected; memory disruption | |
Metaphedrone | lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; clean but short-acting euphoria; intensely addictive(made me feel as if this feeling would be the purpose of the rest of my life); high dosing requirements; memory disruption; corrosive | |
4-Methylpentedrone | lighly entactogenic; intense short acting euphoria; quite potent; quite tweaky | |
Dextromethamphetamine | quite stimulating; intense but short euphoria; long halflife; strong xerostomia(dry mouth) | |
Amphetamine | somewhat stimulating; clean euphoria; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very euphoric and practical via intravenous injection | |
Cocaine | quite stimulating; quite euphoric; heavy cardiovascular side effects; very short duration; surprisingly entactogenic | |
N-Ethyl-Nor-Pentedrone | intense short acting euphoria; quite tweaky | |
Ethylphenidate | mild stimulation; passed out on it on both occasions | |
Mitragynine | quite relaxing yet helpful for working; reduces minor pain; very helpful when crashing from dopaminergic stimulants; encourages sexuality | |
Caffeine | light plesant stimulation; discomfort at higher doses; toxicity has nearly taken my life | |
3-Methylrolicyclidine | relaxing yet mania inducing at 10mg | |
Salbutamol | respiratory enhancement; minimal to no stimulation; cardiovascular side effects | |
Modafinil | effects not notable | |
Pseudoephedrine | effective dosing not reached | |
Methylphenidate | mininmal euphoria and stimulation; interesting when intravenously injected; causes anxiety and strong physical side effects | |
Mephedrone | cat-piss odor; lighly entactogenic; quite stimulating; medium dosing requirements | |
N-Ethyl-Nor-Heptedrone | dull euphoria; extreme body heating | |
4-Methylbuphedrone | barely active; more sedating than stimulating | |
3-Fluoroethamphetamine | barely active even when intravenously administered | |
4-Fluromethamphetamine | barely active even when intravenously administered; softer curve | |
3-Fluromethcathinone | very short euphoria; heavy body heating; quite unpleasant | |
Bupropion | paradoxical pharmacology; caused intense distress | |
Nicotine | light stimulation; causes agitation and headaches |
Psychedelics
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Dimethyltryptamine ❤ | ~15mg vaporized produced very light effects but made me leave with newfound meaning and motivation; ~20mg vaporized produced feelings of shooting through space while completely clear in my head, very clean beautiful visuals for 3 minutes; ~25mg vaporized produced feelings of being torn out of my body and lost in space for 3 minutes; ~30mg vaporized made my subconcious start talking "please help me, I want to leave this place(refering to my place in life)" | |
4-Bromo-2,5-dimethoxyphenethylamine | caused a significant and a horrifying experience; reduces passing of time; overlaying yet intense visuals; interesting tactile sensations; "psychedelic phenethylamine go weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ^w^"; "if this is a mind manifesting drug, than my mind is both love and a nighmare swarm of angry spinning rainbows"; intense 2.5 hour experience when intravenously injected |
Opioids
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Mitragynine | quite relaxing yet helpful for working; reduces minor pain; very helpful when crashing from dopaminergic stimulants; encourages sexuality | |
6-Monoacetylmorphine | obtained by letting Diacetylmorphine sit in a low pH solution for several weeks; quite potent; relaxing to the point of inducing sleep; warm; minor pain reduction; helps deal with siginificant emotional pain; weird dream like states which feel fully concious; encourages sexuality | |
Diacetylmorphine | prodrug to 6-Monoacetylmorphine; not very classy | |
Loperamide | nothing to note | |
Oxycodone | strong apathy and sadness; feelings of body melting; when injected minor euphoria followed by nausea and intense sweating and warmth with only minor pain suppression |
Sedatives
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Bromazepam | relaxing; not very sedating | |
Lorazepam | relaxing; not very sedating; strong memory formation supression | |
Alprazolam | helps in distress; effective sleeping aid; cancels out stimulants if needed; quite potent | |
Diazepam | helps in distress; effective sleeping aid; cancels out stimulants if needed | |
Temgicoluril | helps in distress | |
Pregabalin | reduces some baseline anxiety; doesn't prevent breakthrough sensory overload | |
Zolpidem | effective sleeping aid; strange thoughts and dreams |
Antipsychotics
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Quetiapine ❤ | somewhat distressing / anxiety inducing to use; seams to relieve psychosis at proper dose in the matter of 3-7 hours; quite tranquilizing; unsure about effects on allergy | |
Amisulpride | messed me up at low dosage; kept me safe at a full dosage; quite pleasant probably due to opioid / GHB effects | |
Promethazine | seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy | |
Aripiprazole | way too long half-life; anxiety and discomfort; increased heart rate; teeth grinding |
Antihistamine
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Cetirizine | seamed too improve allergy symptoms | |
Bilastine | seamed too improve allergy symptoms | |
Diphenhydramine | at 50mg pleasantly relaxing, reduced cognitive ability and agitation; seams too improve allergy symptoms | |
Mirtazapine | creates unique bodily feeling; seams to suppress histamine effects; tranquailized me for 2 days straight | |
Promethazine | seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy | |
Quetiapine | somewhat distressing to use; didn't seam to help that much directly but potencially over the hours after use; quite tranquilizing; unsure about effects on allergy |
Antidepressants
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Fluoxetine | immediate improvement; comfortable feeling so far | |
Sertraline | seams to improve well being after MDMA use; notable potenciation of lisdexamphetamine through CYP2D6 inhibition | |
Mirtazapine | creates unique bodily feeling; seams to suppress histamine effects; tranquailized me for 2 days straight |
Nootropics
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Omberacetam | seams mildly stimulating |
Amino acids
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Oxitriptan | seams to improve wellbeing after MDMA use | |
Theanine | light but pleasant effects | |
Acetylcysteine | the taste of rotten eggs ruined my dextromethamphetamine tea | |
Pyridoxine | uncertain activity | |
N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine | uncertain activity; injected 500mg intravenous; corrosive |
Antiemetics
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Domperidone | potencially mild nausea reduction | |
Promethazine | seamed too suggestive to treat acute distress; strongly delayed onset; potencially mild nausea reduction; unsure about effects on allergy |
Antihypertensives
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Minoxidil | promotes hair regrowth; causes respiratory depression at 10-15mg oral administration |
NSAIDs
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Acetylsalicylic acid | reliefs minor headaches; causes useful blood thinning for stroke prevention | |
Ibuprofen | ineffective | |
Paracetamol | ineffective |
Cannabinoids
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Tetrahydrocannabinol | reduces cognitive functioning; slowed perception of time | |
Cannabidiol | causes mental dulling; CYP2D6 inhibition unconfirmed |
Dissociatives
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Ketamine | unnerving if injected rapidly; body distortion; perception in snap frames; amnesia; time distortion; followed by suicidal thoughts; interesting mind manifestation with positive reinforcement | |
Deschloroketamine | similar to ketamine but slighly more rough | |
3-Methylrolicyclidine | relaxing yet mania inducing at 10mg | |
Dextromethorphan | effective dosing not reached; might have worsened previous psychosis |
Alcohols
Compound | Structure | Notes |
---|---|---|
Ethanol | reduces cognitive functioning; euphoric at nauseating doses; rather use this as a solvent | |
Isopropanol | accidental exposure; pretty euphoric and encouraging grandious thinking; causes headaches; ~24 hour duration; rather use this as a solvent | |
Phenol | potencial accidental exposure(blood in my urin); synthesized from salicylic acid for my suicide kit; likely very unpleasant(muscle spasms and cardiac arrest) |